इस बार नहीं

कल प्रसून जोशी कि 26 /11 मुंबई बम धमाको पर लिखी एक कविता पढी! हकीकत को बयान करती ये पंक्तिया इशारा करती है कि अब समय आ गया है ठोस फैसले लेने का, न कि दर्द को चुपचाप सहते रहने का, क्योंकी आतंक को चुपचाप सहते रहना भी तो एक गुनाह है.

इस बार नहीं
इस बार जब वो छोटी सी बच्ची मेरे पास अपनी खरोंच ले कर आएगी
मैं उसे फू फू कर नहीं बहलाऊँगा
पनपने दूँगा उसकी टीस को
इस बार नहीं
इस बार जब मैं चेहरों पर दर्द लिखा देखूँगा
नहीं गाऊंगा गीत पीड़ा भुला देने वाले
दर्द को रिसने दूँगा, उतरने दूँगा अन्दर गहरे
इस बार नहीं
इस बार मैं न मरहम लगाऊँगा
न ही उठाऊँगा रुई के फाहे
और न ही कहूँगा की तुम आँखें बंद कर लो, गर्दन उधर कर लो मैं दवा लगाता हूँ
देखने दूँगा सबको हम सबको खुले नंगे घाव
इस बार नहीं
इस बार जब उलझने देखूँगा, छटपटाहट देखूँगा
नहीं दौडूंगा उलझी ड़ोर लपेटने
उलझने दूँगा जब तक उलझ सके
इस बार नहीं
इस बार कर्म का हवाला दे कर नहीं उठाऊँगा औजार
नहीं करूंगा फिर से एक नयी शुरुआत
नहीं बनूँगा मिसाल एक कर्मयोगी की
नहीं आने दूँगा ज़िन्दगी को आसानी से पटरी पर
उतारने दूँगा उसे कीचड मैं, टेढे मेढे रास्तों पे
नहीं सूखने दूँगा दीवारों पर लगा खून
हल्का नहीं पड़ने दूँगा उसका रंग
इस बार नहीं बनने दूँगा उसे इतना लाचार
कि पान की पीक और खून का फर्क ही ख़त्म हो जाए
इस बार नहीं
इस बार घावों को देखना है
गौर से
थोड़ा लंबे वक्त तक
कुछ फैसले
और उसके बाद हौसले
कहीं तो शुरुआत करनी ही होगी
इस बार यही तय किया है

प्रसून जोशी

Thank you Ma!

Our first touch, first love, first care, first attachment, first lesson of life starts with her. She is the one who knows us nine months prior to the whole world. No doubt, the first word that we utter is Ma. No amount of words, no amount of celebration, nothing can compare with what she does for us. For me each and every day is mother's day. Her daily phone call is like a therapy for me, sharing recipes, gossips, she telling me about life and sometimes I advising her. Being far away from her makes me realize how much I miss her. I was never senti types but the day I left my house, food cooked by Mom, her care, I realized her importance. I know, my Mom won't be reading it and I wouldn't be able to say all these things to her face. She will definitely shush me but I can't help saying THANK YOU MA! Thanks Ma for being there, for supporting me always, for making little lies to save me from Pa when I did some mischief. Thank you for putting up with my excuses when I did not want to go to school. I still remember during my Board exams when me and my bro, both of us were down with typhoid. The way you took care of us, helped me in revision and stood by us as a pillar of strength. How I used to wake you up for my early morning studies and you got up at 4 just for me. The sleepless nights that you had to endure because of my acute bronchitis. The whole night I used to suffer from cough and dyspnoea, you would be sitting by my side taking care of my needs. The way I used to say no to food when you did not make the food according to my likings.Now, I understand the importance of those simple yet precious meals cooked by you.See, that's why I have started eating everything which I detested eating in my childhood. You sacrificed every thing for us. It was as major as forgoing your needs for fulfilling our desires or as minor as leaving your favorite TV serial for our sake. I am sorry for fighting with you, taking you for granted. I dread to think of the absence of you existence in our lives. Ma, please take care of yourself for me.
You taught me everything whatever I am today. It was your love, support and counselling that got me through everything. I can't write more..where's my phone? I need to talk to you, Ma..........

From Heaven to Ekla Cholo Re..

7th of May is Rabindra Nath Tagore's Birthday. My first memories of Tagore belong to Heaven poem read in school textbook.....

Where the world has not been broken up into fragments by narrow domestic walls
Where words come out from the depth of truth
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection
Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way
Into the dreary desert sand of dead habit
Where the mind is led forward by thee into ever-widening thought and action
Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake

It still reverberates in the deep of my heart. And I can bet, there would hardly be any student who doesn't feel inspired and proud of being an Indian. Over the years, the thought and the gist behind the words have not faded into oblivion!
Gurudev was born in the year 1861. Winning the Nobel prize in 1913 for his master piece Gitanjali, Tagore is a doyen of Indian Culture.
Another evarlasting memory associated with Gurudev is of Ekla Cholo Re. This song has some inherent energy reminding of that era and filling the mind with the belief to always move forward, come what may. These are the Bangla words of the song along with a rendition by Kishore Kumar.

Jodi tor đak shune keu na ashe tôbe êkla chôlo re,
Êkla chôlo, êkla chôlo, êkla chôlo, êkla chôlo re.
Jodi keu kôtha na kôe, ore ore o ôbhaga,
Jodi shôbai thake mukh firaee shôbai kôre bhôe---
Tôbe pôran khule
O tui mukh fuţe tor moner kôtha êkla bôlo re.
Jodi shôbai fire jae, ore ore o ôbhaga,
Jodi gôhon pôthe jabar kale keu fire na chae---
Tôbe pôther kãţa
O tui rôktomakha chôrontôle êkla dôlo re.
Jodi alo na dhôre, ore ore o ôbhaga,
Jodi jhôŗ-badole ãdhar rate duar dêe ghôre---
Tôbe bojranôle
Apon buker pãjor jalie nie êkla jôlo re.

How I sacrificed something dear to me....

They say it takes three weeks to change habit! There are lots of thing that change over time but one thing that remained unchanged till now was my sleeping habit! Ohh...how I just love to sleep till the wee hours of the day!I always detested getting up early so much that even my board exams could not deter me from my sleep. I would always duck it for some reason or so during exams but when it became impossible to make excuses with my mother then as a last resort, I threatened her up with..."if I am getting up early to study then you would also have to get up with me". And my poor mom, she complied with my request and got up at 4 AM with me for the whole duration of exams {How we used to get all the royal treatment when we sat for our board exams}. Anyways, morning sleep is always so wonderful although you know that outside the whole world is waiting ,then also you want to sleep for five minutes more. Throughout school, college, office my love for sleep remained unchanged. Thankfully, my Ma-in-law was as accommodating as Mom, so she too never asked me to get up early. (I think this is enough to establish my love for morning sleep) Alas! One fine day, it all changed! And bouquet (or brickbat) goes to my hubby dear! He is also a lover of sleeping in the morning but suddenly he realized that he is growing horizontally (in simpler terms...gaining weight)and he need to do something for it. Then he took off his jogging shoes and started morning walks. Lo...the tummy was going back to its normal position..my hubby was getting back hs boyish charm and I had a nightmare that I have become fatso (like Ayesha of today) and he is falling for some PYT (you can read sania!)...no! I could not sleep through all this! I have to get up and don my jogging shoes too! I could not let that nightmare be a realty! And that way I sacrificed my morning sleep. Now its been six months and both of us love every minute of that one hour spend amidst nature. We enjoy walking, running, doing stretching, meeting different types of fellows (whom we have secretly given nicknames). We love getting up at 5 and enjoy our time together. Although, sometimes my love for sleeping prevails over my addiction for walk but soon the thought of fresh oxygen in the lungs, first rays of sun bathing everything, chirping of birds, wet grass, exhilaration of running fills my mind and I get all geared up! I suggest you all to please get up and go for a morning walk....as heady as a glass of chilled beer! (only that it keeps you fresh all day...no hangovers!)

Witnessed the launch of INS Chennai

There are some moments in life which are beyond words. One such moment that I witnessed this morning was the launch of Naval Destroyer INS Chennai, built under the code name of Project 15 Alpha. Invited by a family friend, I could not say no to be a part of it especially a Naval warship. Being wife of a Ship Surveyor has made me familiar with the nity gritty of shipping industry and I could not miss an opportunity to see how ship after building in the yard is sent to the sea. The outer structure of a ship is called hull, which could be compared withe skeletal system of the body. After bulding hull, comes the process of putting in vital organs of the body like engine, generator, purifier, piping system, propellor,rudder...each serving for the proper functioning of the ship.Ok..lets come to the event of launching...We reached Mazegon Dockyards Limited (MDL), Mumbai. As soon as I entered the premises, there she was standing in front of me with all its splendor and glory, 163 m long with a weight of 6700 Tonne INS Chennai. It is propelled by four gas turbines and designed to achieve speeds in excess of 30 knots. This is India's third Missile Destroyer in the series of INS Kolkata and INS Kochi which would be equipped with Brahmos Missile, twin tube torpedo launchers and rocket launchers. Mrs Elizabeth Antony, wife of Defence Minister A K Antony pressed the button and propelled it into the sea. Chief of Naval Staff Admiral Nirmal Verma called it a red letter day for the nation. I was very mush proud to be a part of this event and could share the joy and satisfaction evident in the faces of workers and sailors of MDL. Proud to be an Indian.

Smells and everlasting smells...............

A small organ known as Nose plays an important role in our lives. I am not talking about the most vital function of breathing in but it's about the olfactory function of the nose...smelling. How smelling is important can be understood from a simple fact that when we are down with common cold, we are unable to find similar taste in the food that we used to relish earlier. It's just because that our sense organ for smelling..Nose is not working properly that we cannot smell the food we are eating. Eating is not just about eating, its about enjoying the food with all of our sense organs. As I said earlier, various kind of smells provoke various emotions.How some smells make us feel happy like food, smell of freshly baked cookies wafting from the kitchen, smell of our loved ones, smell of mama's hands just after she has made delicious food for us. I still remember the smell of my grandma's hands when she used to put "prasad" in our mouth after pooja. That lovely smell coming from baby's body with all those baby powders and oils after they have been massaged and bathed. The smell of morning with all its glory, dew drops on leaves, smell of rain water on mud...aha that is a divine smell especially when the rain drops fall on a hot, muggy, sunny afternoon. Some smells make me nostalgic, like the smell of new book reminds me of starting of new sessions in class when we used to cover all our books and notebooks with brown papers. Going to a theater with its peculiar smell reminds me of our endless movie watching experience with family and that smell of popcorns and hot hot (read refried, stale!!!) samosas. Ohh...that smell of old blankets in which we cozy up with the family and eat loads of peanuts. Smell of freshly laundered cotton shirts.That sweet smell of rose...aha..and some smells we just would love to avoid as much as possible like that smell of sweat in a crowded place, smelly socks, men throwing gas bombs of ammonia (said with no offence!!!)...Ughh

Some facts about smell....
There are 6 basic types of smell: sweet, fruity, putrefaction-like, spicy, burned and paint (terebenthene).


For a chemical to have smell, it must spread its molecules in the air. That's why a cold dish smells less than a heated one: the vapors carry more of the scented molecules from the food.

Another condition is that the chemical dissolves in the water. That's why during the hot, wet weather we feel that smells are more intense. A field spreads its fragrances after a rainfall and the smell of the bath salts is detected more in a hot bath, no matter how diluted, than in the wrapping.

To feel better a smell we sniff, increasing voluntarily the speed of the air currents passing to the olfactory mucosa.

When we enter a room where something is being cooked, the smell is strong for us, while those inside do not even feel it. This is accommodation: after all the olfactory cells have been stimulated by a specific smell, they stop sending signals to the brain.

The air refreshers act by masking the smell: they do not wipe out the bad smell, but cover it, being more intense, like a loud sound covering other background sounds. How this covering happens is not known, as not all the smells can be covered; sometimes we feel the mix of smells.

From about 110,000 kinds of smells in nature, humans perceive just about 100-200. The smell of children is much finer and those working in the perfume industry can detect 600-800 smells! In women, the smell sense is strongest around the ovulation period, significantly stronger than during other parts of the menstrual cycle and also generally stronger in males.

The left nostril catches smells better than the right one. In 80 % of the people the nose is not exactly on the middle of the face, but to the right. This will enable them to detect the source of a smell, as the slight difference permits a comparison and direction detection. (like in the owls, which have their ears disposed asymmetrically to locate the source of a noise in the dark). 70 % of infections enter our body through the nose.

My documentary on youtube

सेल के शोर में कही दब सा गया है गणतंत्र दिवस का महत्व....

२६ जनवरी के आसपास बहुत से रिटेल स्टोर्स में शुरू हो जाता है सेल का पर्व.... यानि उपभोक्तावाद को राष्ट्रीयता का जामा पहनाने का एक प्रयास. उपभोक्ताओं को लुभाने के लिए चमक दमक के साथ इस त्यौहार की शुरुआत होती तो नव वर्ष के मौक़े पर है, पर २६ जनवरी को वो अपने चरम पर पहुँच जाती है. सच पूछिए तो २६ जनवरी को लगने वाली सेल समापन उत्सव या 'बीटिंग रिट्रीट' होती है जनवरी के शौपिंग फेस्टिवल का. कपड़ो, गहनों से लेकर इलक्ट्रोनिक उत्पादों के अलावा प्रोविजन स्टोर में 'एक के साथ दस फ्री' का जो चारा पब्लिक की तरफ फेंका जाता है उसके जाल में फंसकर उपभोक्ता वर्ग भी २६ जनवरी को बहने वाली सेल की गंगा में हाथ धोने का मौका चूकना नहीं चाहते. फिर चाहे ये सेल उसकी जेब को हलकी ही क्यों न कर दे और शायद ही उस तथाकथित फ्री में मिलने वाले सामान की उपभोक्ता को कभी आवश्यकता भी पड़े. रिटेल कम्पनियां भी गणतंत्र दिवस के मौके को भुनाती है होली या दिवाली जैसे पर्व की तरह पर दरअसल तो ये क्लिअरन्स सेल का ही एक प्रकार है जिससे न केवल उन्हें अपना पुराना माल बेचने में आसानी होती है साथ ही २६ जनवरी की छुट्टी के दिन ज्यादा भीड़ आने की वजह से बिक्री की संभावना भी कई गुना बढ़ जाती है. पर उपभोक्तावादी संस्कृति की ये बयार कुछ सवाल भी खड़े कर देती है. ये सेल किसके लिए है और इसका औचित्य क्या है? चीनी और दाल के बेतहाशा बढ़ते दामो ने जनता की कमर वैसे ही तोड़ दी है. जहाँ कंप्यूटर, टीवी और मोबाइल के दामो में कमी आ रही है तो वही रोज़मर्रा की वस्तुओं के दाम आसमान छू रहे हैं. सिर्फ एक खास वर्ग को लुभाने के लिए लगने वाली सेल के प्रतिदिन छ्पने वाले विज्ञापनों में गणतंत्र दिवस के असली मायने कही दब से गए है. गणतंत्र दिवस का मतलब एक छुट्टी और पूरे परिवार को साथ लेकर मॉल की सैर करने का एक मौका बन गया है.

किताबें झांकती हैं बंद अलमारी के शीशों से

कल रात अनमने से चैनल सर्फिंग करते हुए अचानक गुलज़ार साब लोकसभा टीवी पर नज़र आ गए. उनको देखकर अंगुलियाँ अपने आप ही रिमोट पर ठहर गयी और मैं मंत्रमुग्ध होकर मृणाल पाण्डेय और उनकी बातचीत देखती रही. शोर शराबे, गाली गलौच वाले रिअल्टी शोज़ से और सड़ी-गली ख़बरों की दुनिया से दूर उनकी नज्मों को उनकी आवाज़ में सुनना किसी सौगात से कम नहीं. गुलज़ार साब की एक नज़्म जो आज के दौर में बहुत मौजूं है..पेश-ऐ-खिदमत है

किताबें झांकती हैं बंद अलमारी के शीशों से
बड़ी हसरत से ताकती हैं
महीनो अब मुलाक़ात नहीं होती
जो शामें इनकी सोहबत में कटा करती थीं.. अब अक्सर
गुज़र जाती हैं कंप्यूटर के पर्दों पर
बड़ी बेचैन रहती हैं किताबें
ज़बान पर ज़ायका आता था जो इन सफ़े पलटने का
अब ऊँगली क्लिक करने से बस
इक झपकी गुज़रती है
बहुत कुछ तह-ब-तह खुलता चला जाता है परदे पर
किताबों से जो ज़ाती राबता था कट गया है
कभी सीने पे रख के लेट जाते थे
कभी गोदी में रखते थे
कभी घुटनों को अपने रहल की सूरत बना कर
नीम सजदे में पढ़ा करते थे, छूते थे जभी से
खुदा ने चाह तो वो सारा इल्म तो मिलता रहेगा बाद में भी
मगर वो जो किताबों में मिला करते थे सूखे फूल
किताबें मांगने, गिरने, उठाने के बहाने रिश्ते बनते थे
उनका क्या होगा
वो शायद अब नहीं होंगे!

तुम

मेरे जीवन के साथी तुम
नयी राह के पथगामी तुम
तुम से ही मैं सम्पूर्ण
तुम बिन मेरी ज़िन्दगी अपूर्ण
जब नहीं होते हो तुम पास
इतनी शिद्दत से आती है तुम्हारी याद
तुम्हारी छेड़खानीयां गुदगुदाती हैं मुझे
तुम्हारी मुस्कराहट लुभाती है मुझे
आज तुमसे एक ही वचन की है आस
जब भी जाएँ, जाएँ दोनों साथ
क्योंकि जन्म मरण के परे है हमारा साथ

घर से दूर चले जाने पर आती है घर की याद

घर से दूर चले जाने पर आती है घर की याद
माँ के आँचल की छाँव में गुज़ारे वो पल
और पापा का वो अनुशासित लाड प्यार
वो सुबह सुबह मंदिर से आती आरती की आवाज़
और नुक्कड़ वाली मस्जिद में होने वाली रोज़ की अज़ान
पड़ोस वाली चाची के चूल्हे से उठती रोटियों की महक
या हलवाई काका के खस्ते में पुदीने की चटनी का स्वाद
बाबा का गेट से चिल्लाना की ऑटो वाला आया
और बच्चों का रोना की आज फिर स्कूल नहीं जाना
सामने वाली आंटी का छत पर खुद को मेंटेन करने का प्रयास
और उसी समय शर्मा अंकल का अपनी मुंडेर पर योग का अभियान
तिवारी अंकल का तेज़ी से तैयार होकर ऑफिस जाना
और पीछे से आंटी का हडबडाते हुए टिफीन लेकर आना
कुछ ऐसी ही हैपेनिंग सुबह में अलसाये से हमारा उठना
पेपर और चाय का कप हाथ में लेकर बालकनी में धूप सेकना
आह...याद आती है वो सुबह जो तब हुआ करती थी रोज़ का किस्सा
वो घर जो पीछे छोड़ आये हम और बन गए दुनिया की इस भेड़-चाल का हिस्सा